Mama PlaygroundA Blog for Moms

A fantastic name for a book, to begin with. The author of this book has obviously raised two daughters that anyone in their right mind would be proud to associate with. She has also planted seeds of deep resentment towards her, and within her daughters towards themselves. It is sad to wonder what silent battles they face every day to just feel good enough for approval. At what point in their lives will they discover themselves, and begin to live to fulfill their own dreams. Will they ever even have their own dreams?

On the flip side though, I am not one of those people who read the book, felt disgust and contempt towards the mother, and then made a vow to never discipline my child. This book has taught me that humans are capable of much more than floating around the world in a self-important mission to consume mindlessly and never reach the limits of potential.

At the controversial point in the book where Tiger Mother rejects the birthday cards that her daughters each made for her, the reader has to ponder if she is rejecting her children. There is no doubt they would feel rejected. I would never do the same for my children but in some ways, I respect the gumption and I believe that her girls are probably better off for it. Acting with sincerity is an important lesson in life. I can’t tell you how many times I have thanked my husband for a gift that he bought on-line with zero thought, and at the last minute. He doesn’t learn anything from my hiding disappointment. Actually, it reinforces his laziness and insincerity, and guarantees that I will have a lifetime more of those gifts. That doesn’t mean I could voluntarily break my daughters’ hearts. If they look up at me with those big eyes and proudly display a hand made gift, I will appreciate it.

I don’t think the author is a bad person, but I don’t exactly respect what she did. I think she struggles from a deep sense of inadequacy that she overcompensates for through her children. I also think she will probably perpetuate the cycle in her children by creating that same sense of inadequacy in them. When she speaks quickly, and casually about her daughter putting teeth marks in the piano from frusteration I feel that an entire book should be dedicated to that one act alone – it speaks volumes.